I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
