He is an equal opportunity slut.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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