you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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