I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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