We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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