yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize