i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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