he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize