so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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