Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize