seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
