I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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