its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
