"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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