At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
