woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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