Where did you get a picture of my penis
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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