i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
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Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
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The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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