Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
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