By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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