her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
