For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
