BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
