And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize