Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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