Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Pooping to opera.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize