Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
