you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.