Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
