I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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