it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize