all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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