i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
