Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
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