he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
