dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
