the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
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It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
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I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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