she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
