This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
