No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
