yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
