is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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