is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
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Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
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I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself