Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
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Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
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I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.