Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
