Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize
