We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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