I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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