The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize