Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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