their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
